King Ding-A-Ling

Wednesday night is ladies night part 1. I went to my favorite spot in Miami to have a drink and flirt international style. I happen to sit next to a group of women discussing their men problems. After two shots of Patron, I had to interrupt the conversation. Poor ladies, they’ve been searching for the perfect loves in this wild city. Me being me, I had to ask them about their sex lives.  I can’t believe in this sexually driven city women are having my same issues. They can’t find a man to satisfy their sex hunger without bullshit! Damn I underestimated the mental depth of Miami’s women.  If only we could find men who could lay the pipe right and have a “decent career!” Sounds simple but honey it’s more complicated than most would think.

I told them the funny story of an older Italian guy I use to date on South Beach. This guy was a fun time! We would waltz into every exclusive night club with no waiting and party all night. He was a gentleman and very sweet! However, with all his good qualities he couldn’t last in bed 5 seconds. And the crazy part is, he hadn’t even entered me yet. I would open my legs and he would rub up against my outer lips; and boom! It was over! Now I don’t mind a “Mr. Quickie” as long as that was just the beginning of the evening; but this old man, would role over and go to sleep! He was through after 5 seconds. Now most girls wouldn’t complain because of the luxuries they would enjoy with this type of man. But, I didn’t drive down from Boca Raton after a long work week for nothing! Shit I can take myself out to dinner and walk into any hot spot! I wanted an unforgettable rendezvous! This was ri-goddaman-diculous!

After cracking up laughing, they could relate with stories of their own. That’s fucked up and pathetic! One girl spilled how this fine beautiful man she dated could eat pussy really well but because of his coke addiction, could not get erect! Wtf? If it wasn’t for her vibrator she would never get off. “Oh girly you have a Jack Rabbit too?” I responded. “Who doesn’t?” They all answered.

By the end of the night, we all agreed that it’s a shame to live in this beautiful beach kingdom but can not find “King Ding A Ling”

Waiting on a King

I want a freak

A nasty boy

A general in the army

declaring war on this pussy

He is determined

to own and white flag

that fat cat between my legs

He’ll tame this kitty

making it purr

and walk on a tight leash

A boxer

a ring champion

ready to go

round for round

who can beat and eat  that shit


Destroy that clit

sucking and biting it

Making me promise to behave

and give up all my horrible man dogging ways

A long glider

a super soaker

a  thick 12 inch slider

I wanna beg and scratch

for forgiveness

while he demands the answer to who’s

pussy is this

A Fearless



to go in traitorous deserted lands

turning it into a flourishing wet lands

I want a man to fuck me so good

he drives me crazy

so delirious and


that I want to have his baby

Cursing and screaming

only effects me

if my ass is in the air

and his pipe is drilling


So come on boy

my body is like honey

the taste is sweet

Make me fiend and want cha

If I let you get it

you better fuck me into a coma

I’m so tired of living and fantasizing an

unattainable dream

Trapped in this lonely  beach front tower

surrounded by cowards

loosing hope it seems

I’m just waiting to be captured and rescued

by a king