Full of life

Filled with passion for you

I was a sexual vixen

Only for your body

Like I was on demand

Waiting to be remote controlled

By your command

I was lost in love

and satisfied with vanishing into your world

Spending hours fantasizing about improving and inventing all the possibilities

to make love to you

I was the best at it

You called my name and begged for more

and I gave it to you

The absolute high

to know that I was good at loving

My heart you owned it

and I expressed that with sincerity

each time I let you in

I whispered who it belonged to

and there wasn’t anything that I wouldn’t do

just to please you …

But foolishly

greedy

and dramatically

attention needy

you thought you had me

Holding securely

the lock on my pussy

while you ran around nonchalantly

with any girl you chose to

You thought that the war you initiated

would cause such fatal wounds

that I lay lifeless surrendering to your will

But I am a fighter

who refuses to continually be torn apart

A master mind

who can find

her way out of the dark

A solider who still can battle and win

even after you’ve broken my heart

I won’t play along anymore

I won’t repeatedly give in

You had so many self identity and insecurity problems

You suffered with a lot of psychological bullshit

Always on an egotistical trip

A good man, you’re brilliant at faking it

Exhausted and worn down

It took sometime for my scars to heal

It was 3 years before I realized everything about you wasn’t real

I let you have me over and over

Love blind

I just couldn’t see

That we never made love

You was just conveniently

fucking me

You could care less about the good in me

Because you just wanted a freak

I was trying to escape past hurt

disguising yourself as my friend

you saw comforting me as

an opportunity

You did everything you could to break me down and make a fool of me

I loved who I was

My uninhibited nature for

the man I loved

I was a sweet innocent blend

Of emotions, heart, lust, sex, passion and devotion

I dreamed of forever

A perfect place in my mind

But reality has set in

and I’ve lost belief

That enchanted kingdom I ‘m not trying to find

I’ve broken free from you

and you’re determined

to destroy me

Tarnishing my name and reputation

with words that are so degrading

You have deceived the dogs and puppies with

Sexually demeaning stories

Now they chase me hungry

like I’m some piece of meat

They think at anytime they can run through me

Taking my womanhood low

Telling everyone that I’m a souless hoe

just so it’ll be difficult to find true love or happiness

There is no extent that you won’t go

Smiling in my face

While behind my back you would go from place to place

Ridiculing and demoralizing

trying to turn me into a public disgrace

Hoping that I would run and hide

giving up

Collapsing weak

But you see I’m stronger

A young fool I am no longer

I’ve built my own paradise

my own world

You can no longer hurt me

There is nothing you can do

My life has been a blessing

So beautiful

ever since

I got away from and I’m

So proud to be

Done with you

No longer a little silly girl

Immature to love

I’m fully a woman who has control over her emotions

and protects her heart

I know what real love is

And when I come across it

Every part

of me

My body and soul I will give

Wisdom tells me to never spend my life searching and sacrificing

living

It will find me when I’m ready

All I wanted to be is the love of some ones life

their dedicated freak as well as their wife

Every young woman’s fantasy

Naïve I use to believe

That you would make that dream

come true

You’re just a devilish brutal thief

My innocence

My childish inner peace

You’ve taken that from me……